Dungeon 101 Part One

“I will not be the fattest chick in the room. I will not be the worst/sluttiest/least/most dressed in the room. Nobody cares about my back fat but me. My hair is fabulous. The high heels are worth it. I will have fun. I will not go psycho if a chick approaches us/him. This will be fun. This will be fun. THIS WILL BE FUN!”

This is the pep talk I’m giving myself. I’m naked and wrapped in my little fuzzy blanket. My hair is curled and still in clips. At the foot of the bed I’ve laid out tonight’s outfit: black mini-skirt and red crinkle camisole with a black cover up and my sparkly jewelry. The killer high heels I wore to Rocky Horror are on the floor beside the knee high boots I had initially planned to wear. Last night was the Black Rose Q&A thing that got us $10 off tonight’s Dungeon 101. We have never been to a public sex-positive event in any way: no house parties, orgies, hotel parties, gang bangs, cuddle piles… The closest to ‘group sex’ with strangers I’ve had was when a friend with benefits and I rolled around on the floor of his apartment while his roommate made out with a friend of mine nearby enough for some groping. I had met the roommate before that night, and I’d had a threesome with the other two a few months earlier. And there was a lot of alcohol involved.

Last night was informative and interesting and not intimidating in the least. We arrived way too early because we never know what the parking scene will be like in the city. The Mr. got out to check out the details on the meters and chatted with a couple guys standing outside the pub attached to the hotel where the Q&A session was being held. When he returned to the car I told him I was pretty sure they were going where we were going. The one had on khaki shorts and a polo shirt, but the black leather murse and matching studded belt caught my attention. We were so early we decided to grab a drink and a snack at the bar. When we sat down I noticed the same woman I’d seen walk by while we were still negotiating the online parking meter thing. She was over 40 and fuller bodied, wearing a long pink skirt with hair dyed a shade of red that was almost as pink as her matching blouse. We eavesdropped as she remarked that her burger was medium, not medium rare in a polite, tactful manner. It turned out that she was one of the presenters. When we walked into the ball room of the hotel, the guys from the parking meter saw The Mr. and said something to the effect of, “Imagine seeing you here!”

The crowd was all ages and various ethnicities. We sat directly behind a much-older man who was chatting up a girl that looked barely legal. Across the room there was a fascinating looking person whose gender I would not speculate on. S/he had tattooed legs, short turquoise green hair, hairy armpits and a beautiful complexion. Apparently the Mr. caught the eye of the “hot redhead” across the room, but I remember seeing two cute redheads and am not sure which one he was talking about. On the way out we overheard a girl exclaim, in a Paris Hilton tone, “I can’t wait to get caned. That’s going to be so HOT!” as she craned her neck to eye The Mr. I didn’t get a good look at her, but she brought my claws out.

Over-all, the presentation was well done, very informative and set a welcoming tone for tonight’s event. The hostesses were both fuller-bodied, very “normal” looking women in their 40’s. The brunette is a manager at the club where the event is held and she reminded me of a chick I worked with back in Texas. They covered the questions about what to wear, what about “security clearances” and privacy issues for members, as well as a list of the various educational services the organization hosts and some of the terms commonly used in the scene. Tonight is slated to start out in the same format before they open the “Exploratorium.” They repeatedly described the evening as a buffet where one could sample a variety of sensations in a safe, sane environment.

The Mr. should be leaving work in about an hour, and then we are driving down to pick up our friend, who I have dubbed BF1. BF1 didn’t feel like going into the city two nights in a row but is also a newbie to this scene and wanted to get the full intro this evening. He was going to ride in with the D/S pair and another newbie, but we already made plans to stay at his place after the event so it’s not any real additional driving for us to pick him up. We are going to get take out near his place before going to the dungeon. The ride will give us time to talk about the grown up stuff surrounding euphemistic pretzels, and all that. I admitted to myself (and to BF1 and The Mr.) that my hesitation last weekend seemed to be coming from a sense of skittishness I’m feeling about walking the line between intimacy, comfort and sex again. The Mad Scientist thing ended up more intense than is practical in this kind of situation, and the way it ended cut more deeply that I expected. I’m not saying that it’s wrong or bad to develop feelings for an outside partner (something the Mr. has been reminding me of since The Mad Scientist went MIA on us) but it is not something I’m ready to deal with again just now. I genuinely like BF1, and as backwards as it may sound it’s harder for me to get naked with someone I like than it would be if I only had a casual interest.

However, we have dubbed July as the month of “Fuck it!” So that’s what I’m going with… Fuck it! And now I need to start packing the overnight bags.